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I really don't know what's wrong with me, I keep getting headachs and keep forgetting things. My headachs get so bad that they make me throw up. The forgetting things is what's really messing me up. I forget things like my passwords, I'm glad I have them saved in things. I've missed work because I couldn't remember how to get there, i just told them i was sick when i was lost in Muncie. I forget that I'm taking classes and don't go to them for long periods of time. This is really frustrating. I've had an MRI and there's nothing wrong, but it's kinda frightning. I'm not really sure what I should do, but if it gets any worse, I think i'm going to have to tell people (e.g. work, parents, school) what's going on. It just makes me feel like a screwup, because the only thing i can constantly remember is Super Junior and World of Warcraft, but i'm not away from them long enough to forget them. I'm kinda afraid that i'm going to forget more, like my name, my family and the fact that i am able to do more then sit at a computer reading things that don't matter just because they're fun/funny and playing WoW. Hell, i've went over a day without eating because i forgot to. Tags: frustration, real life, skrewup
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my sisters and i have different talents... one of my middle sister's (i have 2 and i'm the youngest making 3) many talents is making jewelry. I wanted to put her website here because it's really good, I have 2 pieces. the website is www.etsy.com/shop.php and while it says that she only ships to the US, if you live elsewhere, do the buying thing, but wait to pay for it. come to me and i'll have her ship it internationally or just ship it myself for you. If it's not international, just pay for shipping, it's a dollar. I have the black and silver beads and i have one with pink beads. You can wrap them around multiple times and make them look nice, they are long and made for that. Just wanted to pimp my sisters store. the ones i have  and  anyways, i really like mine, and they are good quality and not really expensive. I've been in stores that sell peoples jewerly on comission or whatever it's called and it's not as nice and $35 for a bracelet... Okay time for work, just wanted to pimp some Tags: jewelry, sister, store
Current Location: room
Current Mood:  sleepy
Current Music: F.T. Island ~사랑후애~
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It's been a long time since i've posted. I'm still alive (kinda) and currently am sick... I was in a car accident 2 weeks ago and while waiting on an ambulance, i was standing around outside because i didn't want my knee to lock up and i really didn't have anyplace to sit, my car was smashed. I got pneumonia. It's not a really bad case, i'm still going to work, but my immune system is shot and while having it, i also keep getting really high fevers and 15-20 min throw-up sessions. I actually got sent home from work today because they made me take my temp and it was over 101 degrees Farenheit... I had to have my mom tell them that she didn't want them taking me to the emergency room because it's something the doctors know about and have been treating me for. So i went home and went to bed and slept for 6 hours after only being awake for 7. I am planning on doing more fics when i feel better, but am currently adding people and getting back with people that I was friends with online because I need it. I think I just need to get everything put together on this so I can talk to people and read fanfics because they are fun, but i'm also working on getting better. So i'm off to arrange my friends and set up stuff to try to keep up with people, although i do tend to space and not say anything while reading what others have to say, but I'm not sure how many people really want to read my very scattered thoughts... i'm not very organized in my room, my thoughts or my words later Tags: just me
Current Location: bed
Current Mood:  sick
Current Music: ~Love Like Oxygen~ SHINee
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Pointless (because this started in my head as only pointless smut) Chapter 1/? Pairing: Yesung/Rain/Ryeowook ninja! Siwon/Heechul/Hankyung and Kangin/Jaejoong/Leetuek Rating: up to NC-17 A/N: This started as me being mean to a guy I know that thinks Rain is the coolest and ‘the man.’ So I wanted someone to top him, but really, I don’t believe in Yesung without Ryeowook. Ryeowook had to confess something to his lover. He was sure Yesung would understand, but was afraid that he would take it as Ryeowook not wanting to be with him anymore. That was the last thing he wanted, even if he wanted Rain to join in on their activities. It started with Ryeowook noticing how happy Heechul was with Hankyung and Siwon. The three of them together doing everything from feeding each other to having sex so wild and loud it was demanded they give everyone a 5 minute warning so they could find someplace else to go. Ryeowook really believed that Rain would complete him and Yesung. But that meant not only telling Yesung, but convincing Rain. Was Rain even gay? But Ryeowook had made up his mind. He thought that after a certain run-in with Rain, there was possibly something there, but how mean he was as a response to it was making Ryeowook think that even if Rain liked him, he wouldn’t admit it. But Ryeowook had to try, even if he knew that Rain wouldn’t be as gentle as Yesung always was, although Ryeowook was not sure if that was a minus, or a plus. “…” “Ryeowook?” “…” Yesung cups Ryeowooks chin in his hand, making the younger look up at him. “What is it Ryeowook?” “Don’t get mad.” “Get mad about what?” “I want to try something you probably won’t want to do. But even though I really want to do it, if you don’t, I guess I’ll understand.” Yesung was getting confused at what his lover was saying. “What?” “I really, really love you, but I want to try adding someone. I really like him, but I also never want to let you go. I know Heechul probably just makes it look easy, but we can work it out.” By the end of saying that all in one breath, Ryeowook almost like he’s going to pass out. He looks at Yesung with huge eyes as if saying please, but not able to say anything until he gets a response. “Who?” “Before I can tell you, hear me out. I think we caught him on a bad day, and I really believe that he’s a good guy and that he will be good for both of us.” “Ryeowook, who?” “Rain.” It comes out in the smallest voice Yesung has ever heard Ryeowook use. Yesung remembers that day, when Ryeowook came running to Yesung because Rain was bullying him, calling him a girl and trying to pants him in front of an entire group of people to show that Ryeowook did not have the necessary parts down there to be a guy. Yesung was evenly matched with Rain muscle wise, but the fact that Rain had picked on Ryeowook had made Yesung mad enough to easily overpower Rain and beat the shit out of him. He also remembers all the other looks Rain has given Ryeowook with a sneer, as if wanting to hurt the younger boy. Knowing that Ryeowook may go try to talk to Rain by himself, getting himself hurt if Yesung was not around, Yesung agreed to helping Ryeowook go and talk. He had to see if there was something hidden behind the sneer, but doubting it. Tags: title: pointless
Current Location: work
Current Mood:  amused
Current Music: ~sora kara oritekita shiroi hoshi~ W-inds
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normally, i love the snow, but right now it's a sign of everything going wrong in my life... i was happy and all when i was in Florida for my Jan-Term class because i went to Disney World which was really fun and then the shit hit the fan i got forced into taking medical leave from my school because during fall semester, i was put in a psyc ward because of medication i was put on. once that medicine was out of my system and i was evaluated and put on new medication though, i'm fine now... i now live back at home with my mother... GOD I HATE LIVING WITH HER!!! it wouldn't be as bad if she didn't attack my eating habits... no eating after 6pm, no eating chocolate, all these stupid rules because she thinks i'm too fat... what if i don't care if i'm too fat??? what if i'm happier that way??? i'm working at the office for a week until i meet with my vocational rehabilitation person, then my parents want me to work at a factory and get some 'real money...' hey, i'm only $300 overdrawn in my bank account and $5000 in debt with credit cards... along with that, i have game night when i'm home, it's Thursdays starting at 7 and ending whenever we leave... normally around 11, the job my parents want me to take interfear with that and now, it's snowing... it's thursday... and my mom dosn't want me out and about because of the weather it wouldn't bother me as much if we could get something other than dial up where we live and i could have my World of Warcraft and play it and such, but no, can't have that... and now they want to take away Halo 3???? my life really sucks right now well, to amuse myself, i took this 'how easily amused' quiz on facebook and this is what i got amused by anyting that comes your way  everything you look at makes you smile or think..sparkles make you smile and stare! while colors of a school bus make you wonder why they're are giant bee's in the street. at least i got a good laugh in today ^_^ Tags: amused, real life, suck
Current Location: work
Current Mood:  distressed
Current Music: ~Thunder~ F.T.Island
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psychobarbiehax's journal
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